My heart starts to believe again… To embrace this bliss Should I let go of my fears? The walls I built, the boundaries I set If I give you my heart Will you take good care of it? From morning hellos to sweetest good nights and every story you tell Gave me something to hope for That I may have found The clarity that would clear every doubt in my head Because right this very moment I feel so at peace Looking up the skies Knowing someone out there Cares enough to bring back the happy soul I once was
Tonight, there is something to reminisce…
Of a love, of a boy, of a heartache
Still a bit clueless but I know there is something to remember…
Mine heart not easy to forget
Mind cares of who had left
Every night I want nothing more
But to mend this regret
Leave traces of him behind
Tonight, let it be the night
To send off memories to the sky
Consume my thoughts with all the “what ifs and should haves”
Till I get tired…
Till I get lost…
Till I run out of reasons
Tonight, is the night
To put these feelings to sleep
And to wake up one day
With no flashing histories
Cause the only thing I know is just his name
Everytime I close my eyes
I see different scenarios
Of you, of us…
of breaking apart…
of you loving someone else…
of me struggling to breathe
Of you regretting…
of me moving on…
Yes, so many stories in mind…
so many thoughts run wild…
Why are you building walls around your heart?
Isn’t it so unfair?
You were blocking me instead of her
You built a wall so very high I couldn’t break in
But you allowed her to get inside
Then she left you unwanted again and
This is the saddest thing about love
We build walls to keep the right people out
And allow the wrong person in to wreck us freely.
On the count of three…
One… two… but
I can’t… I just can’t go on without leaving a short note…
A note with a gentle tone and simple strokes of humor
From this sturdy pen
For the sake of moving on
Proving that we can be wrong
We’re both pathetic
Caring for the careless
Clearing their confound mess
Surrendering to being reckless
We’re both horrendous fools
Believing lies after lies
Denying the truest truth…
A plain fact that we can’t have the ones we love
But we keep chasing them
Hastening the race
Ending up losing
Your battle with her
Mine with you
On the count of three…
Am more convinced to set you free
Whilst nurturing this fruitless tree
Hoping someday your mind will change
And feel your heart in closer range
But reality speaks volumes
Fair and convincing that…
I am the lover you took for granted
You are the pursuer she left for gold
We’re both crippled afraid to heal
Always taking a u-turn
Scared our paths will cross again
I may not be able to mend completely
Are you ready?
Am I ready?
On the count of three…
I must run…
Runaway from here
Runaway from you
Runaway from love
One… two… three… go!
Celebrating four years of blogging!! To my dearest friends out there I wanna say “THANK YOU VERY MUCH!” for the wonderful comments, for taking time to read my posts, for all the likes and follows. Sorry, I’ve been out of touch for months for several reasons and I promise to be back once I have my schedule (life as well) fixed. I miss everyone and I miss poetry a lot.
“In the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.”
the same with…
In the end, it’s not the number of likes, follows, and comments we get on our blogs. It’s the friendships we built and the lives we touched through our posts.
I am so proud to call you mine but you…you don’t belong to me. I wish I could be there for you, be your smile while you trail some battlefields, be your tears while you cease their fears, be your aid when you feel afraid, and be your hero while you save their lives. I’ll fight alongside perils as much as you do but you’ll be with your troops and I’ll be on my own. I’ll be awake all night building sweet memories of you, dreaming many dreams till the breeze wake me up to reality – a reality that could possibly break my heart.
I cannot hold you long but you always have my heart. I cannot keep you close forever but my prayers are always with you. I may or may not see you again but in my thoughts, you’re always around.
I promise to look after you – not what I can touch or see but what I can feel. Whenever you miss me just look up to the sky, I’ll be somewhere in those spaces reminiscing our love. You’re always free my love, you’re not mine for keeps, but let me love you in difficult times, love you in inevitable calamities. As you give your life, your heart, and your soul for everyone’s safety and for peace, I’ll be here praying for your return. This is a terrifying risk to take for I may not kiss you awake. (But please come home safe)
One who loves you forever
*dedicated to wives and loved ones of our soldiers in Marawi City fighting against some terrorist group.
Nothing hurts more than
Giving your best shot
And being left alone with so much pain in the heart
I know you tried your very best to see the wisdom of everything…
Behind every downfall
I know you are stronger than yesterday
Yes I know you will survive
Yet allow me…
Allow me to wander in solitude sometimes
I wanna let time unfold itself…
Twist the hands of the clock
Tighten the verdict of reality
And let healing find it’s way back to me
I know you need to breathe
Sniff the scent of goodness this life could offer
Would it be alright to refuse your call?
I wanna yield into sadness for a short while
See the truth why I have to savor its’ sickening taste
Why I have to torture myself and
Dwell into forbidden thoughts
I wanna hold on to memories of my unfriendly past –
Till I master the art of letting go
I know you’re weary and tired
You wanna rest and live in peace you’ve been praying all night
Yet permit me…
For a moment
And find the way to life
It is through this rebellion
I could clarify my confusions, resolve the mystery of a broken vow,
And decipher the hidden code of this sorrow.
Yes I wanna drown myself in bitterness
Kill the hope in my mind
Till it buds forgiveness
And ready to betray darkness
Hold on to me
Till I see the light
Never will I let you down
I promise to
Free you of the pain
That’s haunting you in vain
We will survive.
What shall I do now?
Now that I have completely fallin’ for you
You gave me reasons to still believe in miracles
To wait for surprises
To see what is ahead of us
Something to look forward in the future
Can this be love already?
Every time I close my eyes
I sigh! I breathe deeply
Wishing you were here with me
A hug would be alright
Little kisses but not too much
I just wanna hold your hand
And may never let go of it
You hold my heart now
A keeper I know I can fully trust
Yet I cannot say
“Yes I am all yours now”
You know what I mean?
I am not good in so many things
I am so hard to be with
I get so terrible sometimes
Bad hair days
Noisy and loud
Funny and the not so funny jokes
I get lost sometimes
Confused, anxious, scared
Will you be there in times I am difficult to love?
Sometimes I say serious stuff
For you to think about
It may be just some weird predictions of what would happen in the near future
Can you help me with my faith?
Help me with my struggles inside?
More challenges I added to you
A burden I have become
Help me believe in your heart
Show me what love is all about
Tell me stories
Of endless love
Will you be there when I have to weather all storms
Can you be my rainbow?
Can you be the rain when I can’t get through this pain?
Can you be my voice when I can’t speak?
Be my thoughts when I can’t think?
Can you fill my pen with your ink?
Write my words I can’t even express?
I have so many demands
While you only ask for one thing
Just to love you
And everything will follow
And so here I am Scribbling in the new pages of my book
A different chapter
Another fairy tale
About to unfold
Once upon a time…
Will there be a happy ever after waiting?