Forgiveness in My Pocket

Life has been very tough and there are people I wanted to forget, emotional traumas to mend, and memories of friendship to bury 6 feet under. I am not a lover of vengeance yet there are circumstances that would lead me to believe in its scornful power. I just don’t know how to seek revenge.

I grew up having some attachment issues to deal with but I was able to manage it out of my system. I was able to let go of people and yet preserve those good memories with them. That’s a good exercise for the heart.

The truth is I am tired of this cycle – tired of being someone’s mistake. Their wrong perceptions and false accusations about me have become my spiritual downfall.  Why? What have I done to these people? I am not supposed to be petrified of their misjudgement (especially when they are not real) but I care too much that I allowed them to break me.

People do change – but why am I involved in their own issues? Some people will never understand how I live my life and why I kept loving and trusting these wrong people. Should I retract when they hurt me? Should I hide from my own truth? Who holds the truth? I believe there is a God who knows every detail of my journey. I trust His plans for me and there is a reason why some friendships don’t last a lifetime. But there is nothing more painful than being betrayed by the person you really trust. Isn’t it unfair? that some people would go against their sanity and create a monster image of me in their minds. How am I supposed to defend myself? I wonder what to do with these people. I know goodness will prevail and I am waiting for that day – waiting for that moment that the Holy Spirit will touch their hearts. However, I need to let go of them, not that I despise them, but out of my great respect for the wonderful times we had. It’s a waste of time to hate and I can let go of it easily.

Right now I feel like running away – away from this terrible world, away from all social-media dramas and just be productive most of the time.  There is love when you forgive. There may be some limitations to it – you forgive, you let them go, but never allow the behaviour of others to affect your inner peace. Stop blaming yourself for their unwarranted character instead move forward and learn from that experience. Keep praying and meditating for yourself, for others, for the people around you, and for your future relationships. Allow peace to reside in your heart and pull out forgiveness when you need to.

There is more to life than our failed relationships/friendships, remember the Buddhist proverb it says

“Like a lotus flower that grows out of the mud and blossoms above the muddy water surface, we can rise above our defilement and sufferings of life!”
Forgive, forget, and forever shine like a lotus flower.



19 thoughts on “Forgiveness in My Pocket

  1. amazing choice of the tittle and article was amazing too. You were honest in this article and that does means a lot for readers like mine. A writer’s words should always talk the language of there heart. keep it up.

  2. One thing I would like tell dear sister Quirky. ..don’t get unnecessarily involved too much in people’s lives I very well known that your intentions are good but it hurts a lot when people ignore you and just walk away

  3. Yes the quote about the lotus flower is appropriate. Social media brings its form of drama that is for sure. People can invent their lives and end relationship willy nilly at a moments notice just because. It is sad actually – people have more of a relationship with the phones and other computer gadgets than they do with people and forget that people on the other end actually have feelings. For me and this is for me I am friendly with people on social media and some I correspond behind the scene but for the most part I only interact with the piece I write and the piece they write. I keep it simple. Lest drama. Keep up your spirits and yes one does have to forgive not to let that poison fester in the body which can create illnesses. Stay well.

  4. May God continue to bring healing to you. I know some of what you are facing, and even though it is difficult, there is healing as we continue to walk closely with our Creator.

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