​~I’m Always the One Who Loves More~


I remember those times I called myself a fool…

Fool to believe in “happy-ever-after-endings”.

I was so eager to fall, to take the leap, 

To unleash the chain of fear that once bound my reasoning,

Craving to experience all the wonders and joys of being in love…

The warmth that goes with his kisses and caresses. 

Yes I was a fool to believe in its inconceivable spell,

Like he was the spark in my eyes, the magic I pined for to feel.

I got lost… so lost in my dreams while searching for a pot of gold,

But luck seems distant – a hard catch like his heart.

~

I was a fool to believe that I belong to him,

That he had my thoughts in the palm of his hand,

I stumbled upon his wits yet I know he’s someone I can never be with,

And this love is a tricky game…

Someone has to lose… yes, I was ready for it.

He was the comfort I tried to chase but nothing can hold him back.

I remember those times I called myself a fool…

For finding a star in the sky that would fit his smile,

For learning a language that would complete this poem,

For wandering in a place hoping he would save me.

~

This is the darkest side of love, pushing us to make poor choices, 

One that leaves a permanent scar.

And in this tricky game, someone’s heart bleeds to death…

Surely not him,

As I’m always the one who loves more.
(c) Quirkyshine   ❤❤❤

​~I Don’t Wanna Fall in Love with You~


Not that I don’t like you…

It’s more than that…

More than a phone call

More than pull of gravity

More than a special feeling

It’s like paradise, almost heaven

Closer but not quite

Not the kind of fear I bear 

Not the kind of smile I wear

You are – what my lips can kiss.

You are – what my heart cannot hold

You are untouchable 

Yielded

Non negotiable

You are everything

You are nothingness 

You are my loss

My greatest gain

You are the mean, median, mode

You are science

The theory of my existence 

You are math

The solution to all my whys and what ifs in life

You are art

The unfinished portrait in my mind

But I cannot fall for you

I’m scared to love you

Afraid it grows deeper

Deeper than eternity 

I’m scared to lose you

Afraid I won’t recover

I don’t wanna fall in love with you

Not that you are unlovable

But you are more than anything in this world

Not even the greatest poet in the universe can get close to such feeling

I don’t wanna fall in love with you…

Not until I find the right words to say
(c) Quirkyshine

~How Does it Feel to be Friendzoned?~


There I go…

The zone I am quite familiar with,

The pinch of anguish,

The tone of fervent prayers,

Those restless days and sleepless nights.

Tables turned am back to square one.

There I go again…

Off to this tormenting avenue,

I know much of the place,

The bumpy roads,

The driveways and alleys,

The lanes and streets,

And the end of it.

I dwell not on its pain…

But the bitter taste and 

Sickening scent of falling

Slowly driving me insane.

Those butterflies in my stomach

Even science cannot explain.

How does it feel to be friendzoned?

Oh! It’s like drowning in your own dream

That knock of death of an uninvited guest

The thrill it gets when secrets laid bare

Whose mess is this?

When it’s a love I can’t have.
© quirkyshine

~What Does Cancer Feel Like~

9

(For the fearless survivors)

What does cancer feel like?

Of course, it’s really terrible yet challenging…
The thought of dying soon.
The pain every IV insertion and blood extraction.
The terrible swelling of the veins…
The thought of losing your hair…
The idea of shopping scarfs and wigs…
The cold temperature inside the chemo room
The terrible smell of the food…
The weakness you feel after the last shot…
The worries haunting you at night…
The thought of missing important events (weddings of friends, birthdays of loved ones, Christmas, Valentine’s day)
The idea of writing farewell letters and notes for friends…
The small things that irritate you like noise, bright lights, and other kinds of stuff…
The insecurities you feel cause people gonna treat you differently like everyone gonna treat you like a fragile thing…
The feeling of doing confession every night as you might not wake up the next day…
The scary nightmares creeping into our bones… coffins, big needles chasing us, etc…
The sickening taste of food after chemo session…
The thought of having cancer is a curse… WHEN IN TRUTH IT’S NOT.

However, life is a journey… it has many twists and turns and sometimes it favors the brave.

 

Cancer changed me in so many ways from a very boring girl to being fearless and bold. I dare not protest and resist the will of God. I thought of it like an adventure – a fun trip worth remembering. Truly I am grateful for what it taught me. Therefore, I salute all of you with this kind of battle. It was never easy but we choose to fight.

According to the movie New Life… “we are patients cause they are teaching us patience”.

For me cancer became my best teacher… it taught me to always LIVE FULLY with so much love.

(c) quirkyshine

 

 

~You and My Many Whys~

You are my every “why” now…
Why my mind goes blank when you stare at me.
Why I get butterflies and shivers everytime you are near me.
You are the reason behind…
“why am always smiling”
“Why am always at peace”
You are the reason…
“why it’s so hard to express my feelings”
“Why every waking moment is precious”
~
You are my every “why”now…
Why I sing in the shower again..
Why I dance in the rain…
You are the reason behind…
“Why am still breathing”
“Why I value my life more than ever before”
“Why I wanna live longer”
~
You are my every “why” now…
“Why I kissed my past goodbye”
“Why suppressing my admiration is a heinous crime.”
You are the reason…
“Why I believe in love again”
“Why stars are beautiful tonight”
“Why sunrise has become my new paradise”
“Why sunset became a memory”
You are my every “why” now…
Why I wrote this piece.

(c) Quirkyshine 

Originally posted: http://hesaidshesaidph.com/you-and-my-many-whys/

~Coffee is Love~



I am a lucky cup
Always filled with craziness  and joy
Together we make memories of sweetness
You being my precious drink
I can’t  be me without you
Ground and brewed
My kindda addiction
Your taste will always be best seller
Me ~ a lucky cup forever
Coffee is you
Love ain’t  the same
Without you
A cup of coffee in this dull hour
Makes love worthwhile 

*we always need a cup to enjoy our coffee right? 

(c) quirkyshine